Monday, October 28, 2013

Childrens Books Taught Me Everything I Know about Animals (Central Argument)

“The greatness of a nation can be judged by the way its animals are treated.”


-Mahatma Gandhi







I was raised being told, that all living things should be respected, and as I have grown older I can see, this is not just some romantic, “hippie” way of looking at the world, this is the only way to get the most out of life. Since humans are apparently superior to all other animal species, we feel the right to use animals to fill various needs, such as instructional tools, food sources, fashion and entertainment. 
        A Well Fed World found, “Nearly 10 billion (10,000,000,000) farm animals die each year in the U.S. alone to produce meat, dairy and eggs.” (A Well Fed World 1), this number is outstanding and is only the a statistic for our nation, discluding the rest of the world. On a yearly basis, since the "invention" of factory farming, the quality of farm animals life has vastly diminished. Icanimal.com stated “In 2009, there were approximately 300 fur farms in the United States... In 2011 over 3 million mink were killed for their pelts in the U.S” (lcanimal 1), and the number has only grown since then. A pelt skinned from a helpless animal can provide the same warmth a faux fur one made with acrylic fibers could. Fur is not fashion, it is wearing the carcass of a dead animal. The National Anti-Vivisection Society projected, “Today, in the American educational system alone, an estimated six million animals are dissected every year. Perhaps even more shocking, millions of animals of various species are intentionally “purpose bred” or “harvested” from the wild for the sole purpose of killing and dissecting them in the misguided name of science education.” (Navs 2) Frogs and other small animals and amphibians stolen from their homes to be used for dissection, make up a vital part of their ecosystem. Not to mention the vast amount of other ways of learning about animals. It is an oxymoron, to kill and animal just to learn about that animal. 
      And what for? A pot roast dinner? A mink vest? To learn the anatomy of a frog? While these things may seem normal, there are other, humane options that offer the same experience. Meatless Monday has turned into the cool thing for suburban moms to do, now meatless products are being snatched up almost as quickly as those repackaged white Styrofoam containers. Faux fur looks and feels the same as real fur, but for much less money (and if it was made in china there is a possibility it’s made from a dog or cat hide.) The programs on teachkind.org feature alternatives to dissecting real animals, offering a humane approach to biology lessons. 
       Only due to few genetic differences, we humans are not cooped up in cages awaiting death, only to be mutilated after ward, like our furry counterparts. Unlike humans offering their organs or bodies for donation, animals lack the ability to give their consent does not mean that we can use, and abuse their bodies. As Anders Schinkel illuminates, "There is quite a long-standing tradition according to which the morally proper treatment of animals does not rely on what we owe them, but on our benevolence; animals should be treated with 'compassion and tenderness.'" (Schinkel 3.) Just as humans should respect and honor each others bodies, and minds, animals bodies and minds, though less developed are still a pertinent addition to the world as a whole.


    Chicken factory farming            Cats to be used for dissection 


The fur industry 

                                      

Citations


"Factory Farms." A Well-Fed World. N.p., n.d. Web. 28 Oct. 2013.


Fur Trade Facts." Last Chance for Animals -. N.p., n.d. Web. 28 Oct. 2013.


"DISSECTION IN THE CLASSROOM." Dissection in the Classroom. N.p., n.d. Web. 28 Oct. 2013.


Schinkel, Anders. "Martha Nussbaum on animal rights." Ethics & the Environment 13.1 (2008): 41+. Opposing Viewpoints In Context. Web. 28 Oct. 2013.



9 comments:

  1. I find that your paper was quite interesting and i do believe that any animal should be traeted like us. I do not think they should be put in a factory farm. Your grammar and supports are good and your citations are in the right order.

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  2. 1.) Your topic sentence is very well thought out and gets your point across very well, I love how you started it out talking about how you were raised. Just by that one sentence, I can tell where you are going with your arguement.
    2.) Your support actually does the job it is supposed to do and gives your post that much more emphasis. The facts made me really understand what you are arguing and why.
    3.) The transitions you used throughout the post kept the arguement flowing, and not sounding like a big ramble.
    4.) Your "quote sandwiches" are very nice, I would just suggest adding more of an explanation after the quote, I really enjoyed how you introduce the last quote with the word "illuminates" rather than a generic word.
    5.) The grammar and spelling you use is excellent. Really only one sentence read a little awkward for me, when you said "Only because of few genetic differences, we are not cooped up in cages awaiting death, only to be mutilated after ward." The idea is nice the wording is a little weird.
    6.) Your argument is very strong. Your quotes are moving and factual and your wording is great.
    7.) I absolutely love the quote from Gandhi that you began your post with, it really set the rest of the post up.
    8.) One suggestion I have is to explain a little more on the quotes, so we better understand why you implemented that particular quote into your essay.

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  3. 1) You need more of a topic sentence. I like how you start your post by using personal example, but it doesn’t really tell what you are going to talk about.
    2) You support your argument fairly well, giving statistics and examples of how people are changing their ways to be kinder to animals.
    3) The transitions flow well throughout the post.
    4) All of the quotes you used were used and cited properly, though a little more explanation would be good.
    5) You might want to proof read your post slower next time. Some of the commas are misplaced and in this sentence, the ‘an’ should be ‘a.’ “still an pertinent addition”
    6) You give a good argument on how to change behaviors to be kinder to animals.
    7) I think it needs a better conclusion, and this sentence: “Unlike humans offering their organs or bodies for donation, animals lack the ability to give their consent does not mean that we can use, and abuse their bodies” needs to be reworded.
    8) This is a very interesting post! I had no idea that 10 billion animals were killed each year just for food.

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  4. 1. I like how you started with a lesson that most people learn and refute that it’s not a hippie thing.
    2. Strong support like actually writing out the whole 10 billion (10,000,000,000) and using data from recent years.
    3. Great transitions from the stats to how an animal should be treated like a human.
    4. Properly cited quotes. Just explain the quotes
    5. I didn’t see any grammatical errors
    6. You argument is strong because you have very great alternative ideas, like using techkind.org instead of dissecting a frog.
    7. How are you going to convince people to love animals?
    8. Explain the quotes.

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  5. I like how you started out your topic sentence. It drags you in when you start reading it. I believe that your support is good. You used some good transitions. All your quotes are cited properly, so good job on that. Your spelling and grammar is really good. You did give an excellent argument. One compliment I can give you is that your spelling is really good. One suggestion I can give you is nothing. Overall, great job.

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  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  7. 1. You have a great topic sentence, it grabbed my attention right away and lead into your topic very well.
    2. You have great support to prove your points.
    3. Transitions need to be worked on because if you go straight from a quote to the point that you want to make it might make some of the readers confused,
    4. You need to introduce and explain all of your quotes in order for all of the readers to be able to understand how the quotes connect to the point that you want to make.
    5. There is no spelling and grammar error.
    6. Your argument is strong, it make points that people do not think about on the day-to-day basis.
    7. You brought up questions that we do not usually think about which makes people rethink what is, and should be their priorities.
    8. One thing you can do to improve your post is to explain all of your quotes.

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  8. 1. Topic Sentence: Its great how you started with a story, but topic needs to be clearly stated
    2. Support: Strong use of Pathos, ethos, and logos
    3. Transitions: Need some transitions words but topic follow throughout paragraphs
    4. Quote: All quotes cited wonderfully
    5. Grammar: just proof read next time
    6. Strong Argument: very strong, loved the quote on top
    7. Great in using blog to the best, loved the pictures actually gave me a visual
    8. Closing could be a little stronger

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  9. 1)Good topic Sentence. Its a teaser.
    2)Support goes well and is incorporated properly
    3)Only add a couple transitional words.
    4)Quotes are placed properly
    5)Saw no mistakes
    6) Argument is good.
    7) I can say that this is a blog that did not lose my attention. The way you wroded, and made the post flow made me want to keep reading. AWESOME.
    8) Honestly I don't see much to suggest, but to add more transitional words.

    ReplyDelete